Tuesday, November 07, 2006

The CMAs

I'm not saying all country music is bad because it's certainly not, but what I saw of the Country Music Awards last night made me want to vomit. Before we get into this, let me just say I like a lot of indie country, a lot of old-school country, too. But ...

If you actually like Rascal Flats or Sugarland, I really have absolutely no respect for your taste in anything. And Carrie Underwood, she's got a nice voice and she's pleasant to look at, but I wish Jesus would take the wheel of her career and drive it right into a tree. Brooks and Dunn, shave your mustaches because you just flat-out stink, too.

I've said it once and I'll say it again: Popular, mainstream country music has turned into a retread of '80s crappy pop metal. Thank you Shania and Faith. Folks who used to write bad songs for Bon Jovi now write bad songs for these country artists. Throw a fiddle in the mix and woo-hoo, you have a Nashville tune ripe to become a crossover hit. I'd venture that contemporary country's mainstream popularity has been helped by the same people who made bad bands like White Lion a hit in the '80s.

This is harsh, I know, but it saddens me that garbage has become so huge. There are always people that will listen to bad music (and I listen to a lot of it, too), but the sad fact that this genre keeps getting more popular is chilling. Lyrics full of cliches and pathetic patriotic pandering, music straight from the Desmond Child songbook and blond-tipped hair with cowboy hats on top is basically all that was on TV last night.

And don't even get me started on Sheryl "I'm the new Steven Tyler" Crow. Here's a talented artist whoring herself out for any bit of popularity she can maintain. Sheryl: I know your career is slowly going downhill, but that doesn't mean you have to beg for country fans.

With all this said, Kenny Chesney won entertainer of the year and he's pretty good. Keith Urban knows how to make music, and Vince Gill's been doing just that for a long time. The new Dixie Chicks record is very good. Dwight Yoakam would be a star in any era. So, if it wasn't for this new crop of wanna-be Bon Jovis, the CMAs might just be tolerable.

4 comments:

Laura said...

I don't see Sheryl Crow whoring herself or her career going downhill. On the contrary, since the Texan loser decided his time would be better spent on just admiring himself, she's been going very strong. Despite having to battle cancer.
She'll still be performing and going strong in ten years time, which is much more than can be said for some of the slick pseudo-country artists that Nashville seems to prefer right now.
Sheryl is Sheryl, she does not need to be labelled Rock or Country or whatever.

Pat Ferrucci said...

I like Sheryl Crow, too, but would you ever call her country? Besides that crappy duet she did with Kid Rock, she's never even come close.

But since the duet was her last real hit song, I think she's trying to piggy-back that into gaining more country fans, which is sad.

Now, I will admit, she is nowhere near, not even close, to the whore Steven Tyler is. And she's made way better music over the last 15 or so years.

Anonymous said...

Bon Jovi is the best thing to hot country in ages and a little more of it would do the whole genre lots of good. What's wrong with music that actually sounds good?

And kudos, too, to Little Big Town. What a wonderful surprise they were-like a cross between Fleetwood mac and Crosby, stills, Nash & Young-totally awesome harmonies that made music worth listening to again.

Thanks to them and Bon Jovi, we have country music that actually is memorable for it's beauty, not it's horrific howling.

Pat Ferrucci said...

Does this comment confuse anyone besides me? I have no clue what this person is going on about. But they did compare Little Big Town to Fleetwood Mac ...