What's that old adage about a tree falling in the forest? Or, better yet, what exactly is news?
That second question, it's something I try to answer two days a week teaching a First Amendment course over at Southern Connecticut State University. Why am I talking about all of this today? Well, this story says that '80s German metal group The Scorpions is disbanding. It's a shocking development; shocking, I tell you.
To be honest, I interviewed guitarist Rudolf Schenker about two years ago and he went on and on, in a thick accent that I didn't completely understand, about how the band could keep going forever. But was anybody listening anymore? Don't get me wrong, I know there are people out there who worship at the alter of The Scorpions, who think that "Wind of Change" singlehandedly brought down the Berlin Wall, and who wake up every morning singing "Rock You Like A Hurricane" as a way to get ready for the day. I know that dude exists, and his name is probably Klaus or Adolf. I understand. But do enough folks care for the AP to do a story on this, and for various online news outlets to pick it up?
And, more importantly, The Scorpions think they are Cher. Go re-read the story I linked to above. It says the band is calling it a day. But then it says a new record will come out in March. Then it says the band will tour for the next "few" years.
Um, so The Scorpions are breaking up, possibly in 2014 or something, and that's news? Heck, telling me Coldplay's breaking up in a few years is something I'd hardly consider news. So much can happen before then.
In the case of The Scorpions, the members are in their 60s. Yes, their 60s. So telling me they are going to break up in the next few years just makes me say, "No sh*t." I mean, really, this is news? Some 60-year-old dudes who haven't had a hit in two decades are breaking up? Oh, golly gee, someone get me a chair to sit in; I'm so damn shocked.
Anyway, here's the reason the Berlin Wall crumbled: