So, inevitably, I'll write a negative review of some artist that some angry person really likes and they'll shoot off some hate mail to me. Most of the time, they're just dumb. But sometimes, when I'm lucky, the messages are both dumb and hilarious. Here's one I got Friday, from Cathy in Hamden, which is too good not to share. Keep in mind, this is totally unedited and presented exactly as how I received it.
I HATE YOU!!!!! YOU SUCK!!!!! I hate the fact that you have an outlet to voice YOUR opinion - who cares about YOUR opinion??? Not me - or anyone else I talk to for that matter.
YOU HAVE T H E WORST TASTE IN MUSIC EVER!!!!!
YOU HAVE T H E WORST TASTE IN MUSIC EVER!!!!!
I couldn't resist writing her back and basically telling her she needs to take a deep breath, and that we all have different tastes in music, I'm just giving her the critic's perspective, blah, blah, blah ... And here's what I received:
You're right - we all have our own taste in music (Opinions are like (swear)- everyone's got one). NO ONE'S gonna tell me who I should or shouldn't like as I would not try to shove my opinions down anyone else's throat. WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO SHOVE YOUR OPINION DOWN MY THROAT EVERY WEEK???
I HATE that you get your own paper to do that every week!!! WHERE'S MY PAPER to tell people what to listen to, what to like, what not to like???
WHO PICKED YOU ANYWAY - THAT PERSON MUST ALSO HAVE THE SAME SUCKY TASTE IN MUSIC!
I HATE that you get your own paper to do that every week!!! WHERE'S MY PAPER to tell people what to listen to, what to like, what not to like???
WHO PICKED YOU ANYWAY - THAT PERSON MUST ALSO HAVE THE SAME SUCKY TASTE IN MUSIC!
I hope these brought you the same joy as they did me. Honestly, this made my day yesterday and were way too funny not to share. All because I dissed Godsmack and Daughtry. Oh no!
3 comments:
Writing about mostly local bands, I occasionally get the artists themselves writing angry letters to me. That's my favorite.
That's my favorite too, actually. Those usually aren't as funny, though. Well, I guess they're funny, but not in the same way.
Wow.
This person really needs to switch to decaf. One can only imagine the other differing opinions that she rails against in life. To expend that kind of negative energy is frankly, sad. Quite simply, if you don't like a TV show, you turn the channel; if you don't like a song on the radio, you can turn it off; and if you are so inclined to vehemently hate the opinions expressed in a newspaper, you can simply choose not to read it. But then, I suspect, she would have little to focus on in her angry little life.
Do I - and other readers - agree with every opinion that you express? No. Do we continue to read? Yep. Why? Because they're well-written, informative, usually pretty amusing - and maybe we can steer our ways clear to calmly and rationally consider the opinions of others, and just MAYBE let them influence the way we see - or hear - things.
At any rate, it's heartening to know that you can read such polluting moral ugliness with a sense of humor. Smile that big "First amendment" smile, and keep up the good work.
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