Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Please Help

So I'm starting a fund-raising effort. Who wants to send me money so I can buy Neverland? You see, it seems Michael Jackson is probably going to have sell the heavenly place he uses to lure children, so why shouldn't I buy it? For a mere $50 million or so, someone can purchase the California property. If you guys send me enough money, everyone can come and play on the rides for free!

Sounds fair, right? We can all go on the bumper cars or something and then have a jolly fun sleepover, just like the King of Pop would want.

Anyway, I love this Black Crowes vs. Maxim story that won't go away. As a music critic, I understand that you should never, ever review a CD without hearing it in its entirety not just once, but at least twice. Clearly, Maxim doesn't get that. It's really a credibility ruining transgression. But I do think you can review a Black Crowes disc in your mind without even hearing it: You just know it's going to be a mediocre attempt to copy The Faces and The Rolling Stones.

I remember a few years back — and that could mean like a decade ago — someone published a coffee-table book of celebrity mugshots. I love those things. Here's another one. It seems the skinniest of all "The O.C." stars has gotten herself into legal problems. All she did was drink and drive and have a bunch of weed on her. Stupid people.

I mean, I liked "Juno." I liked it a lot. I didn't think it was a great film or anything, but I liked it. I'm just really sick of all the attention Diablo Cody is getting. It seems like she is, too, a bit. I just think this whole stripper-turned-Oscar-winner story is overblown. Who cares? And what really bothers me is how cliche she is. I mean, the whole "I'm a punk so look at my earring with a skull-and-crossbones on it" is kind of pathetic, don't you think? If we saw someone like her on a regular day, we'd just say she was someone desperate for attention.

Say you went to see Wilco Sunday night and just loved it. You probably can't get enough of the band. Well, NPR is webcasting Wilco's Washington DC show tonight. Make sure to tune in. And if you can't, NPR always archives the show the next day. If you're looking for something to listen to, the Okkervil River show from a while back is a good place to start.

People, including me, are still laughing about Jimmy Kimmel's song about Ben Affleck that aired after the Oscars.

I may have mentioned this before, but I really can't get enough of Daytrotter. Seriously, any indie music fan should make sure to get themselves to the site. It's a treasure chest of fun. I suggest checking this one out.

And with that, I'm out. Have a great rest of the day, OK?


Anonymous said...

Access Hollywood says that the roof of the circus tent is ripped and caving in. If I send you a couple of grand for this, I want some assurance that my seats for the circus will NOT be under that hole.

In all fairness to the Maxim reviewer, wasn't it torture enough for the poor reviewer to have to listen to a Black Crowes album ONCE?

As yes, Diablo. At last, a learned voice of reason (that'd be you, at least in this case!) sees this weirdo for the phony she is. I love the fact that she wouldn't wear the Stuart Weitzman diamond-encrusted shoes because it was a "cheesy publicity stunt," but that it was OK her to parade around in the leopard gown, showing off her "I'm oh so bohemian" tattoos. They don't call 'em tramp stamps for nothing. One can only hope she is a one-hit wonder whose likes we do not hear from again.

Mischa Barton. She's no Diablo Cody, but...hey, she's giving Brit a run for her money.

You think the Kimmel & Affleck video's a stitch? Check out the Elizabeth Banks and Seth Rogan take on it -

Have a good one, PF -

ChrisB. said...

The whole badass/punk thing gets really tiring doesn't it. Diablo Cody is obviously talented, but she's about as punk as Avril Lavigne.

It's even more annoying when you're a parent and you see people desperately trying to make their kids look cool in Ramones t-shirts and Chuck Taylor. How about letting your kid pick out her/his own shoes? (Mine likes anything with lights) And just maybe they'll learn to be a single-minded, independent indvidual as opposed to someone just trying to make sure they look like someone who is an individual.

Anonymous said...

You said it, Chris.

Diablo babbling about things being "stupid publicity stunts" is truly the pot calling the Goth black. I believe the notoriety she's received has gone straight to the faux-dyed hair of hers.

And as for the way that parents try to mold poor kids, well...a friend and I were talking this morning about the apalling behavior of parents at the Hannah Montana - physically surfing their kids over the heads of crowds to get them close to the stage. Decking them out in t's and sneakers that teens probably shouldn't be wearing. I mean - I suppose a 12 or 13 year old is old enough to know what he or she wants - but when you start togging out 5 and 6 year olds in this ridiculous garb, it's obviously a sad sign that the 'rents are living vicariously through their little ones.

ChrisB. said...

No doubt. We were hanging out in the kid's section and Barnes & Noble last week and there were a couple of five year olds decked out in some kind of Hannah Montana inspired neo-grunge outfits (including HM concert shirts). Meanwhile my little punk rocker was decked out in pink pants, pink shirt, and the Dora sneakers she picked out at Payless. Now that is rock n' roll.

Just let your kids be kids. Don't get me wrong, my daughter loves a lot of my favorite music (The Carter Family, Jimmie Rodgers, The Waterboys), but mostly she just wants to listen to her Alphabet Pals tapes when we're driving around in the car.

Anonymous said...

She sounds like a great kid.
Good parenting, methinks.