Wednesday, November 12, 2008

It's Hump Day

Well, actually, it's Hump Day for you maybe, but for me, that happened yesterday. I don't work Fridays. I just thought "It's Hump Day" was a snappy headline. And, yes, I just described something as snappy. I guess all these years of sitting next to Joe Amarante is wearing off on me. Next thing you know, I'll be sitting next to a photo of Derek Jeter and forcing myself to believe that Eli Manning is as good as Phil Simms ever was. Not going to happen.

Anyway, so I'm going off the subject here. And I haven't even established what that subject is yet.

OK, so videos. There hasn't been one for a couple weeks. I know this. You know this, especially since I've gotten 34 e-mails about it. I am sorry. Online and myself are trying to come up with some new way of doing them, something a little better visually. I think the whole "me in front of the camera making poop up" thing has maybe run its course. I'm not finding myself that funny anymore. We should return next Friday (not this coming one) with something a little better, and something that will hopefully evolve into a really good weekly thing. We'll see.

So anyway, what else is new? As some of you might have read, I attended a private opening of the new Margaritaville at Mohegan Sun on Saturday. It was cool because Jimmy Buffett and his band played a whole show from a tiny stage at the restaurant. I'm not the biggest Buffett fan, but seeing him play with only about 400 other people was kind of cool. Oh, and there was an open bar. I would travel to the ends of the Earth for an open bar. The photo above is other people who traveled far for this particular open bar.

I caught "Role Models" this weekend. I am very glad I did. It's the funniest movie I've seen since "Tropic Thunder," which I still consider, easily, the funniest flick of 2008. Nothing's even close. I'm smiling just thinking about it.

I had a friend in college — we'll call her Cait Fitzpatrick — who just had this really unfortunate love of Alan Jackson. It was sad. I prayed for her. Anyway, even back then Jackson was past his prime. But it tells you something about the CMAs when he can nominated for four more awards this year. I also mention this because for the first time ever, I will be doing one of my notebook columns about the CMAs tonight. I am excited.

Um, this is a weird story. What's funny is that I was at a sushi restaurant last week and a Gwen Stefani song came on in the background. One of the people at a table close by kept thinking it was actually a Paula Abdul song. Really?

I guess that's all I got for today. I promise to update this very regularly now that the most hellish part of my November is over.

Oh, and just so you know, here's an inside scoop: There's a free beer tasting at Prime 16 at 7 tonight. I guess the brewmaster from Southampton Brewery will be there talking about his brews. Woo-hoo.


sj said...

i do love your videos. but i think the fact that you're funny makes them funny.

maybe you should try a flash animated version of you. that'd be awesome.

(side note: that's a great blog post idea that i'm going to steal for my own: who would the cartoon version of yourself resemble?)

Anonymous said...

Glad you're back (OK, at least all of us shut-ins, and a couple of lonely prison guys are glad, get the idea)


True enough, SJ.
I'm not really sure that YOU'RE supposed to find your videos funny, as long as WE find them funny. To us, you're sort of like the pre-Victorian era Andy Rooney...when he was 29.
Like any good angst-ridden English major experiences from time to time, sounds like a case of performance "writer's block."
You don't need no stinking gimmicks. You're just fine chatting with us huddled masses out here, throwing in the occasional snarky witticism or piece of pop culture emphemera (just please promise us you won't wear the orange shirt again - that frightens us).

Yes yes, "Role Models" was a hoot. Told ya. Sean William Scott's explanation of KISS was guffaw-producing cinema (and as an aside, I keep wanting to really despise Sean William Scott in something, but he's so oddly likeable that I think I'd laugh at him in an adult diaper commercial. OK, I KNOW I'd laugh at him in an adult diaper commercial. Then again, I just like to laugh at adult diaper commercials). But I digress. Jane Lynch is also a comedy goddess. She nailed every scene she was in.

I hope the open bar was worth it at Margaritaville, 'cause the food ain't. After a visit last weekend, my significant other spent the better part of the evening hugging the porcelein steering wheel (and for the record, I was unsupportive and did not hold her hair back - I was getting nowhere near the projectile path).

That toaster/egg thingy (above) is old news, my friend! You need to get out of the cubicle more. And lemme tell you - it tastes oddly NOTHING like an Egg McMuffin when you're done. Nothing beats an Egg McMuffin. I mean, if you're like me, you like your eggs like you like your women - fake and overpriced. Um...wait a second...

And finally - last weekend, I caught an advance of THE best movie I've seen this year - "Slumdog Millionaire" by Danny Boyle. This is an amazing piece of filmmaking, and I think you'll REALLY dig it. I got the same weird tingly feeling after this one that I had after seeing "There Will Be Blood" (though sadly, the young Indian kid in the movie doesn't threaten to drink anyone's milkshake). Do NOT miss this movie. I will lay down my hard-earned cash to see this again. I'm SURE the Criterion will get it...

So, that's it for now.
Don't go messing with a good thing - your videos are A-OK, and...if it ain't broke, no need to fix it. To paraphrase Sally "Sister Bertrille" Field, we LIKE you, we really LIKE you (now if you'll excuse me, I have to go - I just threw up a little in my mouth).

Be good.
Over and out.

Pat Ferrucci said...

Wait, the toaster thing is not new? How is this possible? How did I not find this earlier? I am not sheltered. In fact, I don't even have a cubicle ... I could have been living life differently all these years? This is shocking and disturbing.

Anonymous said...

Honest injun...

We gifted my 78 year old aunt with it last Christmas. I could probably package it up and send it to you today, since she thinks the egg part is some sort of tool of the Devil.

"If I want an egg, I'll make it in a frying pan" to quote her. So, it's been used only as a toaster. So sad what age will do to you.